BDSM Wax Play 101

Let’s Play with Wax!

I freely admit to a deep love of wax play. Long before the first time that I actually played with it in a more overtly sexual manner, I could not resist the lure of pooled wax. I would dabble my fingers in it, then peel off the layers of hardened wax, and drop them back in the accumulated hot liquid to melt again.

Wax Was My Segue Into Sensation Play

Once I had discovered that that some of the things that I felt and thought about actually had a name, and that they fell under the umbrella of BDSM, I was ready to start exploration.  The how of all that is a story for another time.

Today we’ll stick to lovely wax, which was the first thing that I experimented with.  If I live to be 100, I don’t think I’ll forget the sweet shiver-shudder than ran through me when the first splash of liquid heat made contact with my skin.    I’d started off with a practice drizzle to my wrist, then quickly worked up to having both nipples drenched in white squiggles of wax.  Before long, I had decided to incorporate ice, so that I could have the contrasting sensation of cold and heat.

BDSM Safety is Important

I’m going to let you in on a little secret.  To some of you, it may not be such a secret, as you may be able to apply it to something that you’ve done in the past.

When I first started playing in this manner, it was like a drug.  I wanted more and more of it, and with greater levels of intensity.  That was in the infancy of my path in to kink, and I didn’t have the self control that I do today.  Long story short, I once used a piece of ice to get my skin so chilled that I really couldn’t properly feel the wax as it cascaded down on me.  The end result of that was a burn, and I still carry the scar of it today.

What I won’t tell you is *where* the scar is. ~daughter of the Devil grin~

Since you should do as I say, and not as I do, here are some important things to keep in mind, whether you are a seasoned pro, or a novice just starting out.

1.  Beginners should not use scented or dyed candles.  They burn much hotter, and in manner that you may find most unpleasant.  What you want is your basic white, non-scented, emergency type of candle.

2.  Wax is difficult, if not impossible, to get out of carpets, rugs, etc.  Having an old shower curtain or a piece of plastic tarp on hand can save you a lot of clean up time.

3.  Pulling wax out of hair can be painful.  I personally like to hear the sounds that you will make when it is scraped or pulled out.  But if you are playing alone, and aren’t desirous of that type of sensation, you can use baby oil on your skin prior to beginning.  It will make the wax removal easier and less painful.  However, there is a difference in the sensation of wax on oiled skin and waxed on oiled skin, so take that into consideration.

4.  You may elect to just melt the entire candle over low heat in a container.  If so, save it for use in the future.  Waste not, want not, and all that.  You can then use the melted wax without risk of an open flame.  In my mind, there are two downsides to that:  a) No pretty open flame, and b) wax only stays deliciously warm for so long before you have to reheat it.  That said, one can employ a warmer of some sorts and use brushes, etc, for some interesting sensations.

5.  If you are like me, and find that the flame or flames add to the experience, keep in mind that you are dealing with fire.  It burns.  Not only you, but things around you, including your house.  So proceed with caution, and be prepared for the worst.  Have something on hand to extinguish the fire, should that be necessary, and something to soothe your flesh if you kissed by the flame.  If you are using open flame, be sure to have a flat surface that you can return the candle to after each application of wax.

6.  Remember that different parts of the body respond to wax differently.  As a rule of thumb, I do not pour it above the shoulders on myself or anyone else.

7.  Wax cools as it passes through the air.  Thus, wax drizzled from 8 inches away will be cooler than if I hold the candle two inches away from you and splash the wax out.

8.  Do you want the prettiness of color, but not the increased temperature from dyed candles?  I don’t blame you!  I love to make candle wax art on the human canvas before me, and all white can get boring.  You can melt in small bits of crayon shavings

9.  Keep a bowl of ice and a cool washcloth nearby.  Once you’ve got the hang of just the wax, trying cooling your skin before waxing it.  Be careful though.  You don’t want to end up with a scar like me. ~winks~

What are your favorite things about erotic play with wax?